WELCOME TO WNBA PLAYOFF CHAOS. Here's what I want to see.
This is gonna be fun as hell.
Good morning. THE WNBA PLAYOFFS START TODAY! WELCOME TO CHAOS.
First, if you’ve stuck with me through the entire regular season — thank you! I’ve had a lot of fun, and I hope this newsletter has been helpful.
If you’re new here for the postseason, you can sign up to get the newsletter in your email inbox for free, or for 7 dollars per month, using the link below:
Ok let’s get into it.
Here’s Basketball.
First, here’s how the first two rounds of the playoffs work.
The first two rounds of the WNBA playoffs are a drama-filled, single-elimination mess. In the first round, the No. 5 seed plays the No. 8 seed, and the No. 6 seed plays the No. 7 seed. The winner of each game moves into the next round. The loser goes home. It feels like the NCAA tournament.
In the second round, teams are re-seeded to play against the No. 3 and No. 4 seed. The lowest remaining seed plays No. 3. The highest plays against No. 4.
In the semifinals and finals, teams play best-of-five series without re-seeding.
So what’s does that mean for this season?
Tonight, the No. 6 Sky will play against the No. 7 Sun, and the No. 5 Mercury will play against the No. 8 Mystics.
Because of the re-seeding, if the Mercury win, they’ll definitely play against the No. 4 Lynx. If the Mystics win, they’ll definitely play against the No. 3 Sparks. The Sun or Sky’s next opponent is entirely reliant on the outcome of the Mercury-Mystics game.
Wait it’s just one game? That doesn’t seem fair!
Damn right it’s not fair. Players aren’t huge fans of the possibility of losing an entire season’s work in just 40 minutes. But guess what, friends. This shit is FUN.
Are the game usually intense?
HAHAHAHA. You must not know about Aces forward Dearica Hamby’s shot from last season. Please don’t bring it up with your Chicago friends.
Here’s how to watch today’s games:
Game 1: Connecticut Sun vs. Chicago Sky at 7:00 p.m. ET on ESPN2
Game 2: Washington Mystics vs. Phoenix Mercury at 9:00 p.m. ET on ESPN2
Now that we’ve got the basics covered.
Here’s what I want to see in tonight’s games
Buzzer-beaters. Give me all of the on-court emotions tonight. I need anger, joy, laughing, yelling, and everything in-between. That comes best in the form of a game-winning shot in the final seconds. I want to remember these games like I do Hamby’s ridiculous shot from last season.
Controversial calls. Yeah, gimme something to yell about on Twitter. Jewell Loyd’s did-she-step-out-of-bounds-or-not buzzer-beating three-point shot against the Sparks last week was a nice taste, but let’s get something even more dramatic on the playoff stage, please.
Diana Taurasi draining threes and earning a quality technical foul. Taurasi’s had an amazing season, averaging 19 points on 37 percent three-point shooting, and five assists. It was an amazing comeback from playing in just six games last year due to injuries, and I’d love to see that continue.
But we also deserve a meme as good as her telling a referee TO MEET HER IN THE LOBBY a few weeks ago. Bring the heat, DT.
(It’s also worth noting for new fans that Taurasi is 13-1 all-time in win-or-go-home WNBA games. She’s good at these.)
DeWanna Bonner hyping herself up. Bonner is one of my favorite players in this league because she’s a relentless scorer, quality defender, but above all else, the biggest hype woman for herself. I want nothing in this life but the confidence of DeWanna Bonner after draining a bucket.
Courtney Vandersloot dimes. Because of a last-minute stat correction, Vandersloot finished with the first 10-assists-per-game season in WNBA history. Remember, W games are just 40 minutes long, and Vandersloot averaged 31.5 minutes per game. That’s freakin’ wild. The Sky will have their hands full without Diamond DeShields and Azura Stevens, but I’m ready to watch plays like these from one of the best to ever do it:
Assist mode always activated for Courtney Vandersloot! Averaging twice as many as anyone else in the league! @Sloot226. Myisha Hines-Allen go off to finish her incredible breakout season. Hines-Allen might be the Most Improved Player of the Year, going from 2.3 points per game in 2019 to 17.1 in 2020. Some of that other-worldly jump is because her role has dramatically increased from playing eight minutes per game to playing 30, but in her limited minutes, she was never this much of a do-it-all player. She’s had a helluva year, averaging nine rebounds and three assists, too. She might even make an All-WNBA team. I’d love to see her finish the year strong.
(Plus, how wild would it be for the Mystics to advance to the second round of the playoffs after a 1-12 stretch during the regular season?)
A ridiculous Curt Miller fit. This is important. Please look at what the Sun’s head coach has worn recently:
Also, here’s some DraftKings advice:
Guards to pick
DeWanna Bonner (listed as a guard?), Connecticut Sun ($11,000) - In the playoffs, top players get even more touches, so expect Bonner’s already great stats to get a bump. Remember, DraftKings doesn’t factor efficiency, so even if she shoots a low percentage from the field, it’s the counting stats that matter. And Bonner will rack those up.
Diana Taurasi, Phoenix Mercury ($9,300) - DT in a single-elimination game is a NO-FREAKING-BRAINER, especially for this price.
Ariel Atkins, Washington Mystics ($9,200) - I’d definitely prefer Taurasi at almost the same price, but the Mercury’s perimeter defense STINKS. It would not surprise me at all if Atkins had a big scoring night.
Guards to avoid
Kahleah Copper, Chicago Sky ($8,900) - Copper’s had a great season, but with Briann January likely guarding her, I’d feel less comfortable picking her.
Forwards to pick
Alyssa Thomas, Connecticut Sun ($10,900) - I’d take an experienced Thomas over Myisha Hines-Allen at a similar price. Thomas is averaging 37 fantasy points against the Sky, and without Azura Stevens, her assignment will be easier.
Kia Vaughn, Phoenix Mercury ($6,900) - Of all the budget plays under $7,000, I like Vaughn, who should log at least 25 minutes as Phoenix still won’t have Brittney Griner, who left the bubble.
Forwards to avoid
Emma Meesseman, Washington Mystics ($10,400) - I’ve rarely taken Meesseman all season, and will continue this streak into the playoffs. She’s a great real-life player, and a not-as-good fantasy player on a team that’s become Myisha Hines-Allen’s.
Ruthy Hebard, Chicago Sky ($7,100) - It’s tempting to look at Hebard’s great stats from the final game of the season, but that’s not indicative of the so-so rookie season she’s had. Plus, this is too high of a price.
That’s all I have, friends. You can follow along with me on Twitter @mellentuck tonight if you’d like. Let’s have some fun!
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If you have any leads, please email: mellentuck10@gmail.com or DM me on Twitter: @mellentuck. I miss doing this as a full-time job. All of my previous work can be found at SB Nation, where I worked for the past four years before being laid off due to the pandemic. I uhh also wrote for the New York Times, which you can read here.